Writing envy

I envy those who can write naturally. It takes me time to cohesively put together words that make sense. However, oddly enough it takes me less so to put together ideas. My mind works at a pace too fast for me to keep up. Sometimes I find it hard to concentrate on the tasks at hand because none of what I think of makes any sense on paper. I know now that this is because I am bipolar. One of the symptoms is a racing mind. Thoughts going at a million miles a minute. This of course can be taken care of with proper medication and follow up care with your doctor, psychiatrist, and therapist/psychologist. However, I wonder at times if it’s a bad thing. Yes, I understand my hands can’t keep up with my mind but there should be a way for me to capture these ideas for future reference. I intend to do be things in the world. To help others with mental illnesses. To help those who can’t get access to mental health care because of their station in life. Although my ideas don’t go on paper cohesively at first, I intend to struggle on to achieve success. I want to write papers. I want to write proposals. I want my ideas to reach other people not just stay ideas in my head. I’m not the only person who struggles with this one symptom. Of course there is more to bipolar disorder but this one holds me back academically. This along with procrastination tears me to shreds because it makes me think I can’t succeed. I will practice writing my ideas and normal thoughts everyday… that’s a start, right?